M’sian man earning RM8k a month doesn’t want wife to work but refuses to give her an allowance

AN anonymous social media post about a Malaysian woman’s marriage recently went viral, leaving many perplexed by her husband’s actions.

The post was shared in the Tanya Peguam (Ask a Lawyer) Facebook group before being reposted on X by user @AidaSue.

As of the time of writing, the X post had received over 13,000 reposts and 10,000 likes, with many people feeling sorry for the woman for having to deal with her husband’s antics.

The woman stated in her post that she has been married for seven years and has a five-year-old child with her husband. She subsequently revealed that she was an architect before marrying her engineer husband.

“My husband earns around RM8,000 per month,“ she wrote in her post. His monthly commitment includes his own expenses such as water, electricity, and Unifi bills, an RM2,500 house payment, a fully paid-off car, monthly insurance of around RM1,000, and money for his village mother.”

“My husband only pays for my food when we eat outside together.” She added.

The woman then shared her main marital grievances, including the fact that after they married, the husband forbade her from working. But ironically does not provide her with any allowance.

Additionally, “He asked me to use my own money or just cancel the insurance plan and not use a smartphone for my phone line bills, including the money to give to my mother each month.”

Moreover, her husband claimed that since the expenses were incurred while she was still working as an architect, therefore he shouldn’t have to pay for them.

The woman then revealed that she had to resort to using her savings to pay for her monthly obligations during the early years of their marriage.

Allegedly, when her savings ran out, she secretly sold desserts from her home while her husband was at work as initially, the husband also prohibited her from selling pastries because he would be embarrassed if his friends learned that he has a “wife who sells pastries.”

However, after discovering that the sales were going well, he agreed to let her continue selling pastries as long as his office colleagues did not discover this secret.

The woman stated that she earned a net profit of RM2,000 to RM4,000 per month from selling pastries, but this was only enough to cover her monthly obligations and provide for her mother who resides in the village.

Things worsened when her husband, upon learning of her home-based business income, told her to pay for all household expenses and then claim the money from him.

However, the husband only allows her to claim certain things, and he will not consider claims for the following:

• Electricity and Coway bills, as the husband claimed she’s been using too much electricity making pastries.

• Her lunch expenses, as he claimed that she’s now technically working so she has to pay for her own food. He will only pay for her food if they eat dinner together.

• Their son’s preschool tuition fee, as he claimed that children under the age of five need not attend school.

• Food for their child, as he claimed that why have a pastry business if she’s stingy towards the child.

If that isn’t bad enough, the husband hasn’t even paid her any money since May of this year, even for legitimate claims under the arbitrary system he created!